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Working The Steps

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#1 micealc

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Posted 28 September 2010 - 02:20 PM

I have attended 12 step meetings for a very long time.

I have gone up and down each of them many times,the only trouble is
I still feel I have not done them properly in my mind
I have followed the AA and Official ACA 12 steps.

I am going with Tony As, 12 steps for a few months now and they are making a difference.

They are all focused mostly on me my parents and the HP.

ACA 12 Steps by Tony A.
Tony A. gave a talk, recorded Feb. 25th, 1991 in Orlando, Florida at the 7th Annual National Convention of Children of Alcoholics. The talk was given at an optional support group meeting before the main conference began. During this recording Tony briefly explains his version of the 12 Steps of ACoA. However, by the time Tony was making this presentation, ACA had already approved their "official" version of the 12 Steps in 1984 at a Business Conference. Tony didn't get his version of the steps completed and presented to the fellowship until 1991 when he published his book. Also, with the steps being presented through his book, along with his Laundry List of 14 characteristics of ACoA's, they were and still are under copyright protection.

The original source for this steps list is Tony's book The Laundry List. This book being out of print you have to work to find the book and or the 12 Steps as Tony wrote them. I finally found a copy on http://www.guesswhat...ep-.html</span>

Tony A's 12 Steps of Recovery

The Laundry List
by Tony A with Dan F

Published by:
Health Communications, Inc.,
Deerfield Beach,

1. We admitted that we were powerless over the effects of living with alcoholism and that our lives had become unmanageable. ........Life is/was Unmanageable,yes

2. We came to believe that a power greater than ourselves could bring us clarity............I do believe,yes.

3. We made a decision to practice self-love and to trust a Higher Power of our understanding............yes

4. We made a searching and blameless inventory of our parents because, in essence, we had become them.......... i did,yes

5. We admitted to our Higher Power, to ourselves and to another human being the exact nature of our childhood abandonment. .............done this,yes

6. We were entirely ready to begin the healing process with the aid of our Higher Power............doing this,.......yes

7. We humbly asked our Higher Power to help us with our healing process............yes

8. We became willing to open ourselves to receive the unconditional love of our Higher Power................yes

9. We became willing to accept our own unconditional love by understanding that our Higher Power loves us unconditionally..............yes

10. We continued to take personal inventory and to love and approve of ourselves...............yes

11. We sought through prayer and meditation to improve our conscious contact with our Higher Power, praying only for knowledge of its will for us and the power to carry it out..............yes

12. We have had a spiritual awakening as a result of taking these steps, and we continue to love ourselves and to practice these principles in all our affairs..........yes

So I need not feel that I have not done the steps.
I also need not feel guilty anymore as ,
I am living them daily to the best of my ability.
They are a way of life,and sometimes Ill fall,but Ill get back up and try and live them again.

Edited by micealc, 28 September 2010 - 03:00 PM.

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The happiest people don't have the best of everything, they just make the best of everything they have.
Everything that irritates me in others can lead me to a better understanding of myself.
The no-mind not-thinks no-thoughts about no-things, Shalom.

#2 rejarne

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Posted 29 September 2010 - 09:06 AM

Hi, and thank you for posting the Tony A steps.
I have worked these steps with gratitude and wonder. They work for me, just as the AA steps worked for my addiction to alcohol.
There is a faction in my local face to face meeting that considers the Tony A steps to be somehow 'wishy-washy' and not robust enough to enable recovery. I disagree and am convinced that self love is one of the hardest, and most healing, things I can practice as an adult child. We now read the Tony A steps once a month.
Every time I see these steps posted or referred to I am encouraged as I fear that they may be lost to us over time if we do not share them often. I am blessed to have been able to do these steps and support their wider circulation within the fellowship.
Thanks again
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#3 SteveH

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Posted 30 September 2010 - 03:13 AM

I would love to read some thoughts on The 12 Steps To Self Parenting.

They are attached.

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Progress - Not Perfection

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